Every holiday issue at every magazine around the world is about family and traditions and warm fuzzies. And our 2019 edition is no different. I had penned this ednote a few months before my dear friend Lindsey died suddenly in August. I put together this issue with her in mind. Especially the inclusion of the Karma cookies, she aptly named years ago.
I have a blind friend named Lindsey, who I affectionately referred to as “my blind friend Lindsey.” This is because I frequently walk in her house saying things like “omg, you should see the sunset” We laugh.
Cliché’s are clichés for a reason, because they’re true. And it’s true that Lindsey has given me way more than I could ever give her, no matter how many sweets I bake her, or plays I take her to at TPAC.
Lindsey has seen me through job changes, kid problems, boyfriend issues, boss issues, loneliness and the start of this magazine. Her answering machine says “this is Dr Douglas, leave a message or better yet, call me back direct.” She is a Doctor of psychology and one hell of a smart independent woman. She’s crusty, mean at times, and short, as we all are. What she isn’t is a victim to pity. A victim to a deteriorating blindness from age 30, but that’s all.
One holiday, a family appeared on her doorstep, and within no time were standing in her living room. They were there to give her a quilt she had bought over the phone. She just wanted them to send it like they would to any other customer, but they (no doubt driven by good intentions) insisted on delivering it to her. There in her living room were 4 people (she thinks)— she had no idea who they were, what they looked like or what they were holding. While the intention was good, the experience was not for Lindsey.
She resents being treated like a “victim” with no other identity; folks assume because she can’t see, she can’t do anything else.
What most folks don’t need is pity. What they need are regular folks to treat them as other regular folks.
Rest in peace Lindsay. I miss you more than you could know.
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